I went to the East Coast! Which for a Westie like me is a strange magical place full of tiny states with strange names! Anyway, here's the Pt. 2 of my Magical Radventure!
This is Boston! Boston is full of old-timey buildings where proto-Americans fought and got shot and stood up to the damn British! It's totally historical! This building is where the first porno was recorded. It was illustrated with pen on parchment paper by top illustrators of the day, while scribes wrote down the moans and groans of delight.
Natrually, one of the first things I did was buy a box of cheap tea...
And toss it in the harbor! Take that damn British and naked Prince William and your really nice butt!
I'll tell you one thing, with guys like me, they'll never try to rule us again. Next it was to the original Cheer's bar! I loved Cheers as a kid, but really felll in love years later as an adult when I realized it was about a bunch of loser alcoholics like me!
Of course, it looks nothing like the show inside, nor do any of the actors hang out there.
But they had a variey of character-themed food items. Oddly enough, they didn't have any Diane food items! I did some investigative research and found out, there used to be a Diane's Dessert menu, but it was changed! Someone got rid of it! Apparently, they really didn't like her in Boston!
You can also buy Cheer's themed items at the gift shop. Norm's Nut's anyone?'
I left a photorealistic drawing of Ted Danson as a tip to the waitress. She was really happy!
Later that night we stopped by a really cool diner called, Rosebud.
It was really neat inside!
This was the Rosebud sampler platter. I recommend it.
The next day, it was off to the world-famous Salem, Mass! Look at that evil witch baby!
It's an amazing town! Full of historical relics of those terrible dark times when people were accused of witchcraft and burned at the stake. This is an actual head of a burned witch.
So much history.
And if you want, you can even take a segway witch tour, to get a real feel for how the witches experienced those dark times.
Naturally, we went to the famous Witch Museum to learn the facts about this fascinating era.
One way they would torture an accused with into confessing, is to paint people on a wall, and put some moderately heavy stones on them. Can you imagine how terrible it would be to be slightly discomforted by these rocks?
I can barely look at this, it's so horrific.
An actual magic witch broom! As you can see by the demonstration by our excellent tour guide, it still flies!
Witches were known to employ alligators and shoot them at their foes.
It was very educational. As was Frankenstien's Castle Haunted House Laboratory.
Truth be told, this was a really scary haunted house!
The guys running it were great. They would hit the walls with bats, scream in pain, yell "GET OUT!" walk up behind you out of view and make pig noises super loud.
They were total haunted house pros.
The entire time me and my friend were in Salem we were wasted. Which explains why I made this wacky guy make me this incredible witch balloon! It took like 15 minutes! His hands were shaky and he kept popping the balloons. But he did it!
I really fell in love with this witch! She reiminds me of the Bugs Bunny witch!
The balloon man drew the most incredible chin on her!
And she looked amazing from all angles!
We tried to draw her and couldn't quite capture the magic.
Needless to say, she was quite photogenic!
Sadly, she popped on the boat trip back! I guess witche's powers fail as they get futher away from Salem.
That was that, and it was back to my homies pad. Witch was on ELM Street! How cool is that?
Anyway, the next day I went to an incredible comic shop! Like some real primo shit! It's called Comicazi, and it's a real nutter butter place to find ridiculoso toys and whanot! And manga.
I love this HULK. I wish the Avenger's Hulk was a little closer to this. Especially the hair.
V dolls! Look at those cool jeans!
Plus, Stargate movie action figures! Everybody in Turkey is clamboring for those!
Electronic Robocop with Flight Pack! Woosh! JUST TOUCH HIM! (I think this was based on the cartoon).
Roscoe Pico Train! On the General Lee! And I think that's naked Bo in the back seat?
Elvis, A-Team, Bionic Woman! I had a Bionic Woman doll when I was a small child. It almost turned me gay!
Captain Scarlet!!! With the power of retro-metablysm!
AND Frank Stallone! Sly's brother, who was in one Rocky for one minute as a trash can acceplla singer. Literally, no one in the entire world is looking for this.
Anyway, the store was pretty big, reasonably priced, they had a bunch of kooky old shit, and really cool dudes working there. This is nerd heaven!
I scored a friggin' Starship Trooper's bug for 30 ducks! One of the greatest achievements of my life!!!
Next up, PT. 3! Rhoade Islands!!!